Less Big & Scary
What are some of your goals? Some of your dreams? Can you name them? Have you ever committed to them and put them on paper? Or do they float around in the universe and casually bump into you every now and again?
For my really big, scary, seemingly impossible long term dreams, I always let them float in the universe. They seemed too big, too scary, impossible. How can I take action towards something impossible?
The answer: Write your goal/dream as an “I statement,” as if it has already happened then take small actions daily to make it a reality.
An example. Being pregnant and the year after pregnancy completely destroyed my self esteem. I had never struggled with self esteem or body image and during these two years I struggled with both. During pregnancy I gained 50 lbs and post pregnancy I had 20 lbs to lose and all of my muscle tone to regain. It took me a year to get my body back to a new normal but my mindset was a separate struggle.
In May 2019 I found the podcast The Empowered Mama. In one of her episodes, Lisa said “highly successful people make their success a must and they attach that success to their identity.” So if you want to run more, you call yourself a runner. If you want to be a better partner then you call yourself a loving partner. So I applied this strategy to my self esteem. My “I statement” or mantra became ….
I am beautiful and will continue to do things that make me feel beautiful.
I wrote this statement in my planner every Sunday when I planned out my week and tried to say or write it at least once a day. Is self esteem one of my big, scary goals? Not necessarily but kind of. It was a two year struggle; I had no path towards change and it was impacting numerous parts of my life. This podcast gave me a path.
Remember I didn’t feel beautiful but per the instructions, I wrote my statement in the affirmative. I didn’t give it a lot of thought (meaning it didn’t consume my day) but every now and then I would do something because it made me feel beautiful.
Some examples …
I bought cucumber pads for my eyes so I could have a spa experience any time I wanted.
I started wearing makeup again. I hate that makeup helped me feel more beautiful but my affirmative action is not a negotiation or debate.
I took the time to wash my face at night. I know that may gross many of you out, just like my husband but I am not a night person. I have minimal f***s to give at night and therefore I never made washing my face a priority.
Two months ago, I joined Rent the Runway. I wanted to update my wardrobe but the time and cost to do so was not high on my priority list. For a fraction of the cost, I can try and wear new high end clothes every month. So far it is fun and worth it.
These small changes and putting in the few minutes of care started to transform how I felt about myself. 6 months into writing this mantra every week, I realized that I had internalized my message and no longer needed to write it down. I had actually achieved something big, scary and seemingly impossible!!!!
This is just one of my many big, scary and seemingly impossible goals. What is one of yours? Sign up for one of my classes and lets get to work on making your dream life a reality or transforming your finances.
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Happy New Year!